The Pygmalion effect

November 14, 2011 - Tips To Meet Women
The Pygmalion effect

I came stumbled across an article here about a psychological term called the ”Pygmalion effect‘.  Understanding and being AWARE of this principle will have a MASSIVE impact on your game.  So let’s start at the beginning.  What the hell is it ?  The Pygmalion effect in simple boiled down terms is the concept of a self-fullfiing prophecy, e.g. if you believe your going to fail you WILL make yourself fail.  I’m hoping by now you can see where in your dating success this applies.

If you read any of the newsletters recommended from the ‘Meet Women Now Toolkit‘ you can see countless examples of guys writing in to the ‘Guru’s’ complaining because they don’t think that they are successful, handsome, rich or funny enough to attract a really hot women.  Now imagine  one of these guys approaching a hot girl girl (applying the Pygmalion effect) :

As soon as the guy accepts the belief he’s not good enough…  he’s DOOMED and he will always be unconsciously shooting himself in the foot and the worst part.. he’ll NEVER know he’s doing it to himself! As the article goes on it states

‘Those who believed they were working with intelligent animals (rats) liked them better and found them more pleasant’

So to apply the theory to dating…  If a women believes you are successful she will like you better and find your more pleasant.  In simple terms…  she will adjust HER behavior based on your positive confident cues and will accordingly feel more positive  and attraction towards you.

So how can we use this ‘effect’ to help us out ?  The artilce claims that ‘Better performance resulting from high expectations leads us to like someone more’.  I didn’t quite grasp this concept at first so after some quick Googling I found  a post from a guy on a POF forum talking about an ex relationship:

‘I have found myself, in the past, … become(ing) a rock for them. I’ve found that after the troubles are overcome, the Pygmalion effect kicks in. I end up being deeply involved emotionally and they end up seeing me as the guy that helped them through it all.’

If you can make a girl to find more successful she will ‘like you more’.  Now I’m not encouraging you to go out and try to ‘win’ affection and become a superwuss in the hopes she will ‘like’ you more.  However, if your going on a date or approaching a girl and you make your time together more adventurous and compelling compared to anyone else…   she will become magically more drawn towards you.

Before I wrap things up I also saw another quote in the article that caught my attention was:

‘Once formed expectations about ourselves tend to be self-sustaining’

This means when you first meet a women if create a positive impression by having good body language, positive beliefs and a ‘winning’ mindset after she has mentally categorized you as attractive/positive she will unconsciously reinforce this belief  for you.

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