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The most four common online dating site openers

October 22, 2010 - Online Dating
The most four common online dating site openers

Before I started emailing anyone on plentyoffish.com I wanted see what other people were using to start conversations with. After doing some research, asking a few girls and looking at the responses people email me, I could see a definite pattern of trends people asked. Below lists the most four common conversation starers I’ve come across:

‘Hiya’ or ‘How are you?’. By far this is the most commonly used greeting I’ve come across. If you think about it, saying just ‘Hey’ is extremely counter-intuitive. Out of the all the messages the girl you picked gets, why would she talk the time to read your profile, think of something to say and reply ? After say ‘hey’ your already communicating that your not interesting, after ‘Hey’ where can the conversation go that’s actually interesting… ‘Good thanks, you?’. In real life this might be a good way to start a conversation, but on-line your just wasting time and losing flow. Leave this one alone !

‘Your beautiful’ or some other form of compliment. If you were receiving 30 messages a day. What would you do with someone saying your beautiful and nothing else, as above say ‘thanks’. Would that really motivate you to read the other persons profile, or, even respond ?

‘Want to chat?’ Why ask if you want to chat and not actually chat ?!?! Look at the frame where this comes from, your asking permission if it’s OK to talk to her. Are you too nervous in a virtual world to start a conversation, what would you be like in real life ? Don’t put the pressure on her to come up with something interesting to say, just because you can’t.

‘How was your weekend/What are you up to on the weekend?’ This ones slightly better. It starts a conversation with a base to progress onto further topics. The only problem is its fairly small talk and doesn’t really make you stand out from all the rest of the competition.

So there you have it… its pretty obvious when you think about it. If you want to be the same as everyone else you can go ahead and use them, but your definitely not going to stand out from the crowd. In my opinion when you start a conversation, it doesn’t have to be overly smart, witty or complicated. You don’t need to write an essay trying to sell yourself and on the other hand you don’t even need to read every girls profile you want to message and make some clever comment about it, why invest so much of your time and energy. If you spend thirty minutes trying to write a detailed, funny and witty opener for every girl you wanted to talk to… it would take you all day…. and lifes definitely

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