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A beginners philosophy to approach online dating for newbies

August 3, 2011 - Online Dating
A beginners philosophy to approach online dating for newbies

I want each interaction to communicate I know I’m a catch, you could potentially be a catch.. lets see if your worth getting to know.   My mindset when using an online dating site is that it’s just a gateway to women that I wouldn’t see in bars and clubs.  My aim when I start talking to a girl I’m attracted to is to meet her in real life as quick as possible to see if we click or not.   I’m not going to go out with anyone and the best way for me to decide if the girls worth my time is to meet up in real lifeAs I was learning how to get this area handled I relied on girls talking to me (I wanted to knew some good approaches before I started going for the girls I found attractive).  For me it didn’t matter what the person who emailed me looked like, my initial goal was to be able to transition the majority of conversations into a date.  At the beginning every email I received was a chance to practice (not a chance to get laid).    After a while I had a few realisations:

  • I got asked the same things a lot
  • I wasted a lot of time basically rewriting the same thing over and over
  • Direct an online conversation is pretty easy. If you ask interesting questions the majority of the time the other persons will say, and you ?

After I had this information the next step was to start tracking down some stats and figuring out what worked, what didn’t etc…  I then developed a list of the most common questions that I get asked and some replies.  The more I used the site I also continually improved on these replies.  The more people you speak to, say funny things the more I’d incorporate those ideas and try them on other people.

So for example, a conversation would go like this:

Her : Question 1
Me : Quesiton 1 Reply + Questions 2
Her : Question 2 + “And you?“

or me

Me: Question 1
Her: Quesiton 1 Reply + her questions
Me: her question + Question 2

Using this approach reduced the amount of time I spent on the time.  It also allowed me to develop and constantly improve my method.  The contents in these reply emails were slightly cocky but not rude as there is no tone over email, it needs to be obvious its light hearted.  As part of my stock of question they would all be trying to qualify her, say for example

‘Are you sure your not a sex pest ? just to check…  do you get on with your family ?’

You need to qualify her as I don’t want to take time out my schedule unless i’m going to have a good time.

This would go on for a few emails

Exvhange around 2-5 emails.

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